Embracing Change: Navigating the Return to Work After Maternity Leave
- kayla
- Oct 6, 2025
- 5 min read
Updated: Dec 4, 2025
Understanding the Journey Back to Work
The day you return to work after having a baby can feel like stepping into a new world, one that’s both familiar and foreign. You might feel excited to use your skills again and reconnect with colleagues, but also guilty, anxious or overwhelmed about leaving your baby. These emotions are completely normal. Transitioning back to work after maternity leave isn’t just logistical; it’s deeply emotional.
This period, often called the “re-entry phase,” is about finding balance, rebuilding confidence and creating systems of support, both at home and in the workplace.
The Emotional Landscape of Returning to Work
Mixed Emotions Are Normal
Many new parents describe feeling torn, eager to resume career life but heartbroken to leave their baby. This ambivalence is not a sign of weakness; it reflects the reality of holding two truths: “I love my baby deeply” and “I value my work and independence.”
🌧️ Common Emotions
Guilt (“I’m missing out on important moments.”)
Anxiety (“Will my baby be okay without me?”)
Overwhelm (“How will I manage everything?”)
Grief (“I miss the version of me before parenthood.”)
Relief (“I finally get a break and adult interaction.”)
All of these emotions can coexist, and that’s okay. (Sources: Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, 2021; Maternal and Child Health Journal, 2020)
Why This Transition Feels So Hard
The return to work phase combines physiological, psychological and social adjustments:
Hormonal changes may still be ongoing, influencing mood and energy.
Sleep deprivation affects focus and patience.
Cognitive load increases as you balance work performance, home care and emotional labor.
Cultural pressure often tells mothers they should “do it all” effortlessly.
Understanding these stressors helps you replace self criticism with compassion. (Sources: Frontiers in Psychology, 2022; Harvard Business Review, 2021)
Preparing Emotionally Before Returning
1. Acknowledge the Shift
You’re not “going back”; you’re moving forward into a new phase of life. Allow space for both excitement and sadness. Name your emotions rather than suppressing them.
2. Ease Separation Anxiety
Both you and your baby may experience separation distress.
Practice short separations before your official return (walks, errands).
Use a consistent goodbye ritual (a phrase, song or kiss) to create safety through routine.
Send your baby with a comforting object that carries your scent. (Source: Infant Mental Health Journal, 2020)
3. Establish a Support Network
Create a list of people and resources who can help: your partner, family, trusted friends, a therapist, or parent groups. You don’t have to do this alone.
4. Manage Expectations
You won’t return to your old “normal,” and that’s okay. Productivity might look different, and priorities may shift. Give yourself grace as you rediscover rhythm and focus.
Practical Tips for Returning to Work Smoothly
1. Plan a Gradual Transition
If possible, arrange:
A phased return (starting part time or remote days)
Flexible hours or a compressed work week
A return midweek (Wednesday) to allow a short first week
(Source: Work, Employment & Society, 2019)
2. Prepare for Pumping or Feeding
If breastfeeding:
Review your workplace’s lactation policies (U.S. federal law protects this right).
Invest in a quality pump and storage bags.
Schedule breaks to express milk at consistent times.
Store milk in labeled containers in a cooler or workplace fridge.
For formula feeding parents:
Pre measure bottles in advance for childcare providers. (Source: Office on Women’s Health, *womenshealth.gov
3. Set Boundaries Early
Boundaries protect your mental health and help prevent burnout. Examples:
Avoid checking work email after bedtime routines.
Decline nonessential meetings during your first month back.
Let coworkers know when you’re available and when you’re not.
4. Simplify Decision Fatigue
Streamline tasks:
Plan simple weekly meals.
Prepare clothes or daycare bags the night before.
Create “family command centers,” calendars, lists or shared apps.
Small structures reduce daily overwhelm.
5. Advocate for Yourself at Work
It’s okay to ask for what you need:
A private pumping space
Schedule flexibility
Re-entry training or workload adjustments
You’re not asking for favors; you’re ensuring sustainability. (Source: Journal of Applied Psychology, 2021)
6. Choose Childcare That Feels Safe
Whether daycare, nanny or family care, trust your instincts.
Visit potential caregivers in advance.
Discuss routines, safety protocols and communication preferences.
Start with short days if possible to ease adjustment.
A secure childcare plan reduces anxiety and allows mental focus at work.
7. Create Transition Rituals
Mark the shift between home and work with simple grounding actions:
Listen to a calming playlist during your commute.
Change clothes or light a candle when you arrive home.
Take 3 deep breaths before walking through the door to reset your energy. (Source: Mindfulness Journal of Behavioral Health, 2022)
Emotional Coping Strategies
1. Challenge Guilt With Truth
When guilt arises, try this reframing statement: “I’m providing for my family and modeling balance and resilience.” Working doesn’t make you less nurturing; it expands the ways you provide love and security.
2. Practice Self Compassion
Perfectionism fuels burnout. Self compassion lowers cortisol and boosts motivation.
Speak to yourself as you would to a friend.
Replace “I’m failing” with “I’m learning.”
Acknowledge effort, not just outcomes. (Source: Self Compassion Research by Dr. Kristin Neff, 2020)*
3. Use the 3 Minute Mind Reset
When feeling overwhelmed at work:
Pause and notice your breath.
Name 3 things you accomplished today.
Say: “I’m doing enough.”
Even short mindfulness breaks help regulate emotions and prevent cognitive fatigue.
4. Create Connection Touchpoints
Stay connected to your baby without guilt:
Leave a small item with your scent (scarf, blanket).
Watch short videos or photos during breaks.
Record your voice reading a book for your baby to hear during naps. (Source: Attachment & Human Development, 2021)
When to Seek Professional Support
Seek help from a therapist or healthcare provider if you experience:
Persistent sadness or guilt interfering with daily function
Panic, racing thoughts, or dread about work
Feeling detached or unable to focus
Relationship strain or resentment
Thoughts of self harm or hopelessness
These may indicate postpartum depression, anxiety or adjustment disorder, all of which are treatable.
24/7 Resources:
National Maternal Mental Health Hotline: 1-833-852-6262
Postpartum Support International (PSI): 1-800-944-4773
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline: Call or Text 988
Recommended Resources
Resource | What It Offers | Link |
Postpartum Support International (PSI) | Online groups for working moms and transition support | |
Mindful Return | Online courses and community for working parents | |
The Fifth Trimester (by Lauren Smith Brody) | Book and movement supporting working moms | |
U.S. Department of Labor – Pump at Work Protections | Federal guidelines on lactation rights | |
Working Parent Therapy Directory (PSI) | Find therapists specializing in return-to-work transitions |
Takeaway
Returning to work after maternity leave is not the end of your bond with your baby, it’s an expansion of who you are. You’re building a new rhythm that includes both caregiving and growth. It’s okay to feel everything along the way: pride, exhaustion, guilt and joy.
Give yourself time to adjust, permission to ask for help and grace for the messy days. “You’re not returning to your old self; you’re evolving into your stronger, wiser self.”
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